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  • Jul. 23rd, 2007 at 12:39 AM
For anyone interested...I've sort of moved to livejournal.com/users/m_machiavellism. Well...I post there more frequently, anyway.

However, I'm still posting here.

Lucky Pack OP

  • Jun. 29th, 2007 at 4:56 PM
I finally got it today and...I'm actually rather happy. I got the white OP, bxw gingham skirt(prolly sell this one), white pettipants, bxw gingham pettipants(gorgeous). Anywayz...une photo!

Excuse lack of coordination/makeup/fixed hairCollapse )

luck pack fever!

  • Jun. 29th, 2007 at 9:10 AM
well...not really "fever" it's more like a mild cold now, since so many have been disappointed and since I've had to wait so long! Ugh...I'm pessimistic, entirely but I still want it so I can stop thinking about it!

tomorrow I got to the optom. and get mes yeux checked, it's likely I'll get glasses(why am I happy?). I love glasses, I think they're hot, so...hopefully I'll get a sexy pair that tint in the sunlight.

I'd laugh real hard if I have 20/20 vision.

Mar. 7th, 2007

  • 11:11 PM
I'm so bored right now. I've got nothing to do. I'm thinking that Friday, because I still have the "I want to go out and hang out with people" bug, I'm going to try to go to this art thingy that's going on. I...sort of need to remember where it is.

I'm thinking....that I will study abroad next year. I'm so bored of life. I need a major change. It's stupid that I've been accomplishing so much but I feel so drawl. I think I'm want waaaay to much right now---but I can't help it, that's what makes me so driven. I'm working towards something and I've just got to have whatever I can now. My parents really don't get it. I'm such an expensive child.

I'm a little tired of my neediness, too. I need people, but I don't want to depend on people for anything. All the simple stuff I can handle, it's all the other shit that I need people for. I need someone to tell me that I'm worth something--I've always wanted that. It would have been so simple if, so long ago, he was would been the one to relieve my stress; but no, he just proved me wrong. I don't know why I focus on stuff like this, I have confidence in my artwork, my writing abilities, my intelligence, my creativity, but not my beauty or desireablity. Sometimes I'd trade all the other stuff in for just that. It's stupid how vain I am.

Mar. 4th, 2007

  • 1:56 PM
Last night/this morning was so much fun! I mean, even though there was a lot of waiting and horribly bad beer *cough* and I had/have a bad cold, being surrounded by beautiful japanese guys trying to dance was honestly the most entertaining thing ever. Omg....so many beautiful men. Too bad I didn't get a chance to talk to any of them. Ugh, damn my shyness.

So, before the party I was busy being sick all day. Saw laila_astri's post with her purdy pink hair and decided to follow suit--I did have a whole bottle left of hot hot pink manic panic. So yeah, my hair is multi-faceted hot pink now. LOL. I can't believe it went on so well, I mean, my hair was rather dark brown. After dying it, I rolled it and got my clothes out. I've realized I need a black jacket and a smexy long coat now, I envy smexy long coats.

Any, so I met Eriko at 9pm and we went to the Delta Lodge, got our little wrist band things and went inside. There was NO ONE there, except for a that hot japanese guy. Ugggh. There ended up being a great deal. When people started to come in at around 11/12am, we started dancing and walking around. Some dude gave us each a beer, I saw Pat and Kahori, too. We met this short dude too, he was nice. I saw ----...gwad, never could I have thought that japanese guy + permed hair + glasses= SO FUCKING HOT. He makes me sad for reasons I won't disclose. I talked with him for a while, then he left. Eriko was talking it up with the dude we'd met/danced with, but I ended up being a buzz kill and asking if we could go(my cold was returning and I was getting bored....the room had thinned out a great deal). We got back at around...2am. I'm still sleepy. Oh my god, I HATE beer, and I am an uber lightweight. Saaaad.

Feb. 24th, 2007

  • 11:18 PM
wowzers. I swear this journal wasn't mine....I read some of the old entries and it just doesn't seem like...me. Man, I've changed.

Hmm, so--news, news. I've got another art scholarship. I found out Thursday and I have no idea how much it is. *hopes for more than $1000* I am a poor bastard, someone help me! Well...not entirely poor.

The post office is being a bastard, I finally got a P.O. box and only one of my packages has actually made it there(taken that only one of the other two actually got mailed to the right address). Fudge...I hope it's just being slow. I've never had a package not make it to me. @_@

Um...more important news--I'm still depressingly single, I'm still awesome in French and my art classes(did I mention some of my art was exhibited in the university Union?), and work is super boring.

Eh....I'm tired.

Jan. 12th, 2007

  • 6:59 PM
My financial situation is better but not good enough. I'm absolutely dying right now. It seems everytime I indulge I'm left feeling horribly bad and wanting to sell all of my clothes again. Ugh. Unfortunately I've got nothing to sell really, because I can't do without what I have.

I'm really annoyed with work right now, as my brother, who up and quit the company in July, was just re-hired due to my hard work and they are paying him MORE than me. How in the world is that far? And the only thing he can think to do with his money is buy games. Yes, I do want to buy more lolita items but more often than not I don't because I know I have other expenses(which I cover BEFORE I even think of buying anything new). Now my mom is putting more pressure on me financially...I don't know what to do.

On a lighter note, I recently watched Nana The Movie and am fascinated by Mika's weight. She's 88lbs! I'm absolutely floored. Plus, she's a whole inch taller than me. She's so beautiful.

Dec. 26th, 2006

  • 12:17 PM
I miss posting here as often as I use to. I'm so busy and tired...arg..

I'm so lonely for lolita clothing! I miss the excitement of scurrying to and fro just for a brand dress or skirt. Ugh...I'm addicted--so very addicted.

My first semester at UNT went well, A's and B's. I can't stand that though, as an acquintence made straight A's(she's at a dif. college). I feel like I've failed terribly, what's more is that I feel bad habits arising again--which I can't seem accept are really that bad at all. I keep on with these "maybe if I" or "if I wasn't this," and always end up with the same, groundless rationale. Unfortunately, I've not ever made it far enough for it to be disproved; so, onward!

I've returned.....eh, well---

  • Dec. 3rd, 2006 at 8:05 PM
No, I've not died. I've just been so busy. I really am sorry to the people who actually read my journal, I don't mean to not update. I've just...not had the time.

Anyway, in a nut shell--
I have many cool friends(mostly foreigners from Japan or France, no less) and I'm having a sort of blast. I reaized a few weeks ago how much I missed lolita and jrock and the good old days that's all I thought about. I miss my collection! Ugh! I miss my IW pink plaid skirt. Geez....I miss lolita.

Sooo... I've returned to the land of spending and buying, but this time I'll do it smartly(i.e., buy only stuff I can see myself wearing on campus). Unfortunately before I only thought of my waredrope as "when I go somewhere special/go to a loli meet up" then I'll wear this. Now, as I've come to incorporate my more gothic/punk lolita clothing, and among other things, into my daily attire I've realized I feel a lot more comfortable. So...I'll save my sweet lolita days for the past or...until I come back to it. Right now...I just want to be decked in h.naoto or...some other brand that oozes rock goodness. I've become a real rokr, actually, out of the blue. I guess it's meant to be. But...I want to be cute still though, so I can have both I think! Well...yeah. We'll....see?

I just moved into my new dormroom, I couldn't(or wouldn't) go another semester with a roommate, whether she was nice or not, which for the most part she was. I just....ugh...I can only stand most people for a short amount of time, so the fact that she has a tendency to be rather annoying is why I couldn't see myself in that room with her again. Besides, I like being by myself. XD


  • Oct. 15th, 2006 at 12:12 PM
So far I've met with Kahori three times and my japanese skills are increasing greatly! I lub her so much. She's so great and helpful. It's so cool to have someone to talk to about Japanese music and we both share an unwavering love for Johnny Depp. Any girl that thinks Johnny is the shit on wheels is alright in my book. She also likes similar songs as me. There's a Gazette song that is absolutely owning my soul and she thought it was awesome too. *gleam* I am so happy! Arigatou, Kahori-chan! lol

*needs a good hiragana/katagana font*

Eh, on a side note a met with one of the other people I'm tutoring or...something like that on Saturday. *gleams even more* Hot guy + music junky + smexy japanese accent= me EXTREMELY happy. Needless to say he's really cool(and hot) and we share a lot of the same interests. I might meet him at the lib. and study for some stuff as he studies for stuffs too, but...I might get lazy(in this case unlikely :P). Seriously, I'm really behind in History, I think making a 95 on the test--well 98 now because he keeps adding points to people's tests who actually attend class @__@-- has made me lazy. Ugh...must, resist...temptation to...IGNORE! I really can't focus when my laptop is in the same room as me...I can't. I must travel somewhere(like said library XD) to get down to business.

I'm so tired...gwad. I need sleep? Or...something-something?

*le sigh et le yawn*